Â§hria's Spot

I’m okay, you’re okay

I’ve blogged about my breasts, my vagina, my self-image, my dog, my friends… enough about me, let’s talk about you.

Okay, I suppose I can’t really talk about you other than to link to your blog or offer you the opportunity to comment here… which is enthusiastically encouraged.

Instead of guessing who you all are, how be I blog a bit about what I like in a friend. This is actually the easiest task for me because I recently lost a dear friend. No, he didn’t die. He just fell off the planet and I’ve been wondering why I missed him, or more specifically what it is I missed about him. His absence has given me cause for introspection.

As a result of that introspection I realized a truth I hold to be self-evident: be what you want others to be to you.

In the spirit of this tone, my oath of friendship was created.

I solemnly swear to be reasonably loyal, supportive and honest as a friend.
I swear to do my best not to dis, degrade or otherwise put down my friends (constructive criticism to the face of a friend is okay, though).
I swear to trust, confide in and spy for my friends.
I promise not to expect any one of my friends to be there for me anytime I happen to crave a little company and to allow each of them time to sleep, eat and be with their families.
I promise to take things as they come, not seek to control and to accept what is given freely (even compliments).
I swear to appreciate my friends for whom they are and to try to recognize and celebrate their growth, even if that means they get a better job than me, the guy I wanted to be with, the jacket I wanted to buy this winter or the same hairstylist as me.

Yeah, so that’s what I aspire to and miss most about him. Okay, so no one can be all that they aspire to, but it’s always good to have a goal. I’m also lucky enough to have more than a few people in my life who have come pretty damn close to all of the above, and a few who have raised the bar.

What would your oath of friendship be?