←The real inner me(or parts of what I aught to have been at some time in my life but am beyond hoping for, now)
Still nothing good to write but a few things that need to be written.
This is a very bad time to go, but I am leaving for two weeks of hell with Michele still barely hanging on.
I'm wishing to stay home but my family would disown me -- both kids and parents. They are all that is left now and as much as I hate the things they expect from me, I have to go. Some day I may need someone to go pick up things for me at the store or something.
The plan for Mexico is to wear tents and stay just drunk enough to not to spoil it for anyone else. That, and to work on a better list of excuses of why I can't go back again. That will be fine though, since Dana is almost old enough to just take Nova down there without me. They can be put off for a few more winters until the girls can travel without me. My parents don't really care if I'm there or not, anyway. They just want to spend time with my kids.
It would be the best if I could just replace myself with a cheerful stunt double who is full of confidence and a totally unconditional joy of living. Then, I could stay home with my dog, big black clothes and computer while she goes to the beach every day to swim in the ocean, work on her tan and makes sure everyone has a great time.
Unfortunately, there isn't anyone who could look like me and feel that way. Well, time to stop procrastinating with this stupid blog and do what needs to be done to go.
Now, where DID I put that home liposuction kit, anyway?